The first 10 or so years go by fast; you watch your child learn to crawl, walk, speak, do things on their own, etc. You get to help out with their homework, laundry, and the little quarrels kids have. Then they hit ages 10-14 and begin to experience adolescence.
That little boy you knew a year ago begins to talk to you with a base in his voice. Your little girl gets her first period and begins to experience other changes in her body. This is also the stage when kids become rebellious.
How do you handle this transition and ensure that you maintain a good relationship with your kids?
Try to understand your kids
This is a tough stage for kids; their bodies are changing, and figuring out things they didn't know about their physiology. Your little boy has grown bigger, and he starts to feel that he deserves some privacy and respect around the house.
This is also the period when you'll scold your child, and they'll try to talk back to you. They'll start to push back every time you ask them to do something. As a parent or guardian, it's infuriating, and you might feel the need to pick the good old rod as your parents did.
However, before you pick up that belt, remember that corporal punishment is only effective in the short term. It might help you achieve what you want, but there are better ways to do this. Although this might have worked on you when you were growing up, it doesn't mean that your kids have to undergo the same treatment.
Sit down with your child and listen to what they're going through, why they're acting out, etc. Don't form any opinions or jump to unwarranted conclusions. Place yourself in their shoes and try to understand why they are acting differently.
Hang out with your kids
As they grow older, it becomes increasingly harder to get them to do tasks you like. They prefer to hang out with their ‘cool’ friends or spend their free time playing games, surfing the internet, etc.
The more you keep arguing with your kids about their time on YouTube, TikTok, Facebook, games, etc. the bigger the wedge between you and them grows. They’ll start looking forward to going to college or moving out and enjoying the freedom of being away from home.
It doesn't have to end up like this, especially if you can prevent it. Talk to your child and ask them what they like. Discuss the things that you can do together as a family. You can go fishing together, play video games together, build stuff together, paint each other's nails, watch movies, work out, etc.
Ensure that whatever you choose to do will be enjoyable. Also, don’t try to boss your kid when you’re trying to enjoy family time. Just be a friend and not a parent for those few hours you’re enjoying time together.
Redecorate their room
Your child is growing older, and they'll need to change a few things in their rooms. Up to now, you've probably chosen every single design aspect of your child's room. It's time to let your child choose what they want.
Let them choose what paint colour they want and paint the room together. Also, let your child choose the decor they like. Most of the accessories they choose will probably not last, so choose pieces that aren't expensive.
You can check out an online store where you can get anything from murals, wallpapers to posters. They're at an impressionable age and will want posters of their favourite football players or celebrities. Check out https://www.photowall.co.uk/posters/people for more details.
Get them some grown-up accessories like a full-size bed with proper beddings. Your child has probably grown past the car or cartoon-themed bed.
Encourage independence
You don't have to follow everything your child does. Give them a little bit of space and freedom to be a teenager. However, before you grant them freedom, set some ground rules. Talk about drugs, sex, relationships, and anything a teenager might want to try.
In a few years, they'll be off to college; thus, now would be the perfect time to see how your kids will handle being far from home.
This is still your child, and although they're growing up so fast, they want to feel loved. So, don't be too hard on your kids. Instead, offer the support they need and guide them through this transition from your little kid to a teenager.
