Certain thoughts cross the minds of most stay-at-home mums when the kids are released from the care of their teachers and placed under our supervision 24 hours a day for seven days a week.

While we start out with great intentions, they often fall by the wayside as we try to keep up with the whirlwind that is children, teens and what seems like never-ending free-time.

Spending hour upon hour with our kids is exhilarating, exhausting and endlessly entertaining.

Here are just 20 thoughts every stay-at-home mum has had at least once after the kids have broken free of their school shackles.

1. What is that smell?

No really, what is that?

2. Are they this cheeky to their teachers?

Those teachers deserve a raise.

3. Why are they being so quiet?

My God, what have they done?

4. Must they play in the clean playroom?

Listen to yourself. 

5. What day is it?

The days are morphing into one long, messy free-for-all.

6. Why don't they want to play Tidy-Up?

They loved it when they were toddlers...I think.

7. Is it normal to sleep that much?

Maybe I should call a doctor.

8. I miss singing along to the radio and not being told to pack it in.

I miss alone-time.

9. Is it just me or are the theme songs to children's shows designed to infuriate?

Turn it off. Turn it off. Turn it off.

10. Why won't they go outside and play?

Are they agoraphobic?

11. Why won't they come inside and play?

It's so nice and warm.

12. Who is that child and why are they sprawled across my sofa?

New friends should be introduced properly, for crying out loud.

13. Is my daughter going to stay in her pyjamas all week?

Oh, she is. Oh, right.

14. Should I have enrolled them in a week-long activity camp or something?

Is that what good mums do?

15. Does my son spend this much time in the school toilets?

That's embarrassing.

16. They can't be watching that show again.

I'm hiding the remote.

17. What are they smiling at?

What have they done now?

18. That's it. They're going out on their bikes.

Why have they been gone so long? I hope everything's OK.

19. Why did they neglect to mention their project until the final day of break?

Do not scream. Do not scream. Do not scream.

20. How many times must I tell them shouting is forbidden in this house?

Unless I'm the one doing it.

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