It takes a village to raise a child.
Unfortunately, during a global pandemic, villages are off limits, and that was pretty tough.
We took care to follow restrictions, sometimes more rigidly than required to keep our family safe. Especially with a high risk pregnancy and being in a bubble with high risk individuals. It was the right thing, but it was a hard thing.
There were flying visits for birthdays, welcoming new arrivals, Christmas and check ins. Bundles were dropped off and a bit of time taken to shout pleasantries from one end of the garden to the other. These brief moments were so wonderful and so sad at the same time. Every time I've closed the door after a visit, I cried my eyes out. Full on ugly cried.
They were bright moments in a gloomy time, but sometimes the glimpses of light seemed to highlight the darkness even more. They couldn't make up for a year and a half of missed birthdays, a bump becoming a baby, family gatherings, watching nephews and nieces grow or a million other things that happen in a 'village'.
I really struggled to keep in contact during the pandemic. I'm fairly quiet and shy at the best of times... During a lockdown there is nothing going on and no news to talk about. Who wants calls about nothing?! So I didn't make them and the longer I went without making them, the harder it was to start. They became a big deal in my head... The more time that passed, the more I worried people would be annoyed I hadn't been in touch already and the more anxious I became that I had to have something really 'good' or 'interesting' to say.
It was a strange juxtaposition believing that no one wanted to hear from you while simultaneously believing that everyone was mad at you for not being in touch. As strange as it is, though, I'm certain I'm not the only one having trouble readjusting.
Maybe your friend is still scared of getting sick, maybe your sister is struggling financially after being out of work because of Covid, maybe your brother feels awkward socialising again after so much time in isolation. You might not understand the reason someone isn't getting back to 'normal', you might not even know it... But, maybe its not just the newborn that has them out of touch.
It takes a village. Not just to raise a child, but to support the adults raising the child.
