A mum has shared the incredible letter her daughter poignantly mailed to the doctor who suggested she be terminated.
Little Emmersyn was diagnosed prenatally with Down syndrome, and when her mum came to her doctor for advice in a state of worry and fear, he suggested she reconsider going ahead with the pregnancy.
“This is Emmy, mailing our letter to the prenatal specialist who didn’t want her to live,” mum Courtney Baker told ParkerMyles.com. “He repeatedly suggested we abort. He said her and our quality of life would be horrible. He was so unbelievably wrong. I want to do something to advocate, but other than my letter to him, I don’t know what yet.”
Well we think the letter, which has been shared thousands of time, is a pretty good place to start.
And while the piece is an open letter from Courtney to the doctor, when you read it you’ll see it’s actually more for the parents of kids with Down syndrome who perhaps felt the same way Courtney did on that doctor’s visit.
“Dear Doctor,
“A friend recently told me of when her prenatal specialist would see her child during her sonograms, he would comment, “He’s perfect”. Once her son was born with Down syndrome, she visited that same doctor. He looked at her little boy and said, “I told you. He’s perfect.”
Her story tore me apart. While I was so grateful for my friend’s experience, it filled me with such sorrow because of what I should have had. I wish you would have been that doctor.
“I came to you during the most difficult time in my life. I was terrified, anxious and in complete despair. I didn’t know the truth yet about my baby, and that’s what I desperately needed from you. But instead of support and encouragement, you suggested we terminate our child. I told you her name, and you asked us again if we understood how low our quality of life would be with a child with Down syndrome. You suggested we reconsider our decision to continue the pregnancy.
“From that first visit, we dreaded our appointments. The most difficult time in my life was made nearly unbearable because you never told me the truth. My child was perfect.
I’m not angry. I’m not bitter. I’m really just sad. I’m sad the tiny beating hearts you see every day don’t fill you with a perpetual awe. I’m sad the intricate details and the miracle of those sweet little fingers and toes, lungs and eyes and ears don’t always give you pause. I’m sad you were so very wrong to say a baby with Down syndrome would decrease our quality of life. And I’m heartbroken you might have said that to a mommy even today. But I’m mostly sad you’ll never have the privilege of knowing my daughter, Emersyn.
“Because, you see, Emersyn has not only added to our quality of life, she’s touched the hearts of thousands. She’s given us a purpose and a joy that is impossible to express. She’s given us bigger smiles, more laughter and sweeter kisses than we’ve ever known. She’s opened our eyes to true beauty and pure love.
“So my prayer is that no other mommy will have to go through what I did. My prayer is that you, too, will now see true beauty and pure love with every sonogram.
“And my prayer is when you see that next baby with Down syndrome lovingly tucked in her mother’s womb, you will look at that mommy and see me then tell her the truth: “Your child is perfect”.
Emmy is now a happy, healthy and much loved little girl who is spoiled rotten by her parents and her two big sisters, Rhyan, 15, and Evynn, 11.
“The girls both said that at soon as they met her they fell in love,” Courtney told ParkerMyles.com. “And it was obvious. A lot of healing happened at that moment. We never looked back to the fear and sadness, it’s been onward in the smiles and joy. Rhyan is the calm, quiet, motherly refuge for Emmy. Evynn is the wild, fun, cracking up laughter for her. They are a perfect trio.”
We don’t know about you, but we’re crying. This wonderful letter has filled our hearts, and we just know it will bring comfort to other parents who experienced Courtney’s anxiety and fear.
All photos ParkerMyles.com.
