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My baby's already been born, but people think I'm still pregnant. What can I say to them?

Only mothers really know the toll that pregnancy takes on the female form. People assume that once the baby has been delivered, your body will suddenly revert to its former size and shape. Their comments, though intended to be supportive, can be very discomforting to you. You may find yourself at a loss for words, especially if this happens daily. Try using some of these suggested response types, next time you are confronted by someone with an incorrect assumption:
 
A straight response states the facts simply. Tell them “I am not pregnant,” or “My baby's been born already.” If you feel like being a bit humorous, say: “no way am I pregnant, I'm just fat!” While the straight forward response is sure to make the recipient feel uncomfortable, it is not up to you to worry about their feelings, since they didn't think too hard, before making their assumptions.
 
If you are feeling sympathetic, a kinder response is better – especially if the person asking you the question is a child. With an adult, try something like, “I've given birth already, my body just didn't get the memo.” You can say to a child, “it only looks like there is still a baby in my tummy.”
 
You could try a dose of reality for the person asking, by saying, “my body cannot get back in shape overnight, after nine months of carrying a child.” You can even go into more detail and explain about how a uterus expands, how your belly swells and then suddenly contracts, leaving a whole bunch of loose skin.
 
You can even give a deflecting response, avoiding giving a real answer altogether. If someone asks you when your baby is due, give the day of the week your child was born on, and find a handy exit from their company. You can give a very vague response, such as “some time this week.” You can even act superstitious and tell them that you consider it very bad luck to speak of such things so near to the time.
 
If you are feeling fatigued, or annoyed, you can use a cutting, witty response to the 'due date' question: “Nine weeks ago, actually.” If you feel confrontational, simply say, “wait, are you trying to tell me I'm fat?”

More questions

There are some very good reasons that you would want to avoid sexual intercourse.
Your vagina will naturally shrink after delivery, as your body heals, but whether it returns to its original size, depends on a number of factors.
Your menstrual cycle usually starts towards the end of your breastfeeding phase, but how regular it is once it is back varies from woman to woman.
It is not uncommon for women to experience pain and discomfort during sex, for the first couple of months after having a baby.
Yes, breastfeeding has a direct effect on the size of your uterus.
The general consensus among healthcare providers is that it is safe to have a nice warm bath straight after delivery.
Being sleep deprived does not make for a happy relationship. If you’re suffering from lack of sleep, there are a few things you can try.
Exercise is definitely a part of dropping post baby weight, along with a healthy diet. However, there are limits to how much you can do and how soon you can start.
It is very important that you do not use sleep remedies, including the herbal variety, before talking to your doctor - they could have an adverse affect if you are breastfeeding.
Some doctors, and many women as well, have reported that applying raw, cooled, cabbaged leaves to the breasts helps to reduce milk production and the discomfort that comes with having engorged breasts as well.

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