We all like to be supportive of our kids, especially when they're having a bad time of things. But it turns out that empathising isn't so great for parents.
A study at Northwestern University and University of British Columbia examined how a more empathetic parent was likely to have higher levels of systemic inflammation.
This is when your immune system releases masses of proteins that spread throughout the body and can have an effect on the interactions between cells.
The study examined the psychological and physiological correlation of parental empathy in 247 parent-adolescents relationships over a 14 day period.
This was done by analysing the parents’ relationship with their children’ relationship quality, stress, depression and time spent together alongside parental empathy.
Meanwhile, the teenagers - aged between 13 and 16 - completed two weeks of daily diary reporting on their ability to control their emotions.
Both the parents and kids provided blood samples to measure systemic inflammation.
Their relationship was also measured where the teens scaled the harshness of their parents’ disciplinary techniques, and the warmth and support from their parents.
Though the research showed that being empathetic makes people feel good about themselves, there was some negative impact on the parents.
In order to be more empathetic towards to their child, a parent had to suppress their own emotion which is known to increase physiological responses to stress.
Although this had a positive effect on the teen, who felt more secure and supported, those who suppressed their emotions frequently also showed higher levels of inflammation.
The ability for a parent to empathise with their child is a central role to good parenting but, of course, all good things come at a cost.
SHARE if you’re happy to take the risk for the sake of your child’s happiness.
