A mum has written an incredibly powerful letter, pleading to people who see a mum struggling not to judge – but instead to be kind.
Single mum-of-two Aly Brothers was left hurt and tearful after being shamed in the supermarket when her two toddlers misbehaved.
As we all know, we can’t wave a magic wand and have our kids behave the way we want them too. Sure, we can try, but it’s not always successful.
So after trying her best throughout the trip soothe one crying toddler, and another that was jumping around energetically and disturbing other customers, she finally got them to the till – where the boys began to have tantrum over a balloon.
And instead of looking at Aly and thinking, “That poor mum must have her work cut out”, the other customers in the queue glared at her and her kids and passed hurtful comments.
“They screamed, they cried, they fought,” Aly wrote in the letter. “I handed the balloon to another cashier to be put back and they cried louder. My youngest pushed buttons on the card machine while my oldest picked up candy. The people in line behind me glared. The cashier glared. Everyone's eyes were on me as if to say ‘can't you control your own children’.
“One older gentleman whispered, ‘She's pretty young for two kids’ and I lost it. She handed me my receipt and I cried. They don't know me. They don't know me as a mother. They don't know my children. They don't know I was married before I started a family. They don't know I left that marriage because of abuse knowing I would have it just as hard as a single mother. It's hard people. The glares and whispers and judgements are hard.”
Aly felt compelled to write the letter because she wants people to understand that this judgement makes being a mum so much harder. She wants people to know that some simple kindness or understanding will make all the difference as we do the hardest job in the world.
“Sometimes I can control my children and sometimes I can't,” she finished. “Sometimes they listen and sometimes they don't. Sometimes I can handle it and sometimes I break down. I know these days will pass, the tears will stop, the fighting will cease, and my babies will be grown. And that will be hard too. So if you see a parent struggling, if you see a kid throwing a tantrum, if you see a mom on the verge of tears... please say something nice. Please don't glare with judgement. And to all moms out there having a day like mine... I see you, I know you, I love you. You are strong and you are doing just fine.”
Such necessary words, and so powerfully put.
