Look, we can't all the Martha Stewart. There are some days, weeks, heck even moths where the laundry just seems like a never-ending pile, cooking completely sans vegetables.
And those days, it can be very easy to feel like a 'bad mum' for ordering take-away. Don't.
Author Bunmi Laditan hits the nail right on the head, cutting through all of the mum-guilt with this simple, yet powerful Facebook post.
Laditan admits that she's no domestic goddess- she even wrote a book about it. But even though she jokes about I like joking about "laundry piles and pizza delivery", she admits that that she still feels guilty that "I don’t have a lasagna in the oven and that there are two (three) unfolded baskets of clothes on my living room floor right now."
"I feel guilty that I and I find myself thinking, 'A better mom would have put those away and have the week’s meals all planned out'," she writes.
Like so many of us, she starts listing the things that she should have done in her head, all the reasons why she's not a 'better mum':
"A better mum wouldn't have spent $200 at the grocery store yesterday and have pizza on the way right now. A better mom would have washed the kids’ sheets today and cleared the mail, toy, and other random clutter off of the kitchen counter. She wouldn't have so many toys in the family room and a dried strawberry milk ring on the coffee table.
"A better mom would have..."
Overwhelmed, she took a minute to breathe, then she asked her eldest two, “Are you guys happy? You feel good?”
And her eldest's reply completely took her aback; “Why wouldn't we?”
While she was worrying about so many different things, she forgot to appreciate all she already gives to her children.
"Could it be possible that all of the things I tear myself apart for, all of the things I hate myself for, aren't as important as I think?
"I cooked on Monday and we had leftovers on Tuesday. I’ll get to the laundry this weekend (I hope). Homemaking is hard for me. But I give really good hugs. I listen to them. I massage their backs some nights when I they’re having trouble settling down. We laugh. They feel safe and like coming home."
At the end of the day, isn't that all that matters?
"If my motherhood were a cake it wouldn't be fancy, but it would taste good. I need to let that be enough, I will let that be enough."
