1. Insist on riding inside the trolley
When they’re tots, they’re desperate to get out of the baby seat; when they’re old enough to walk alongside you, they’re desperate to get back in. There’s something about a trolley full of shopping that says “Sit on me”.
2. Start a racing game
It doesn’t matter that they have no competitor, you put a child around a giant shopping basket on wheels and they will race with themselves. Try and nip this one in the bud as soon as you see them preparing the run-up – otherwise you can prepare for a lot of huffing, puffing, and disapproving looks from fellow shoppers.
3. Sneak completely useless stuff into your trolley
If you gave your child your shopping list and told them to fill up the trolley, we can pretty much guarantee that you will not find a single item you need by the end of the shop. Whether it’s cheese in a can or a novelty bottle opener, they’ll always manage to sneak in something random.
4. Start eating the food you haven’t paid for
We’re all familiar with the sight of that tiny tot slobbering all over a bread roll in the supermarket, but it’s the suspicious looking one in the trolley that you need to keep an eye on. Whether they make a grab at the biscuit shelf or they decide to tuck into that packet of ham, you’ll need to keep a keen eye on your little one!
5. Steal from a neighbouring trolley
Their mischief truly knows no bounds, and when they clap eyes on those chocolate bars in the next trolley (the ones you refuse to buy because, E numbers) they decide to take matters into their own sticky little hands.
6. Demand that disgusting new product
It’s always the multi-coloured, sugar-loaded product that our kids are most drawn to, not the shiny bag of red apples. Despite spending hours ingraining into them how important and yummy healthy food is, they will still kick up a fuss when you draw the line at the white chocolate-mint-caramel bars covered in sprinkles.
7. Throw a tantrum
Speaking of kicking up a fuss...Whether it’s over the refusal of the aforementioned bars, or their frustration when you stop to talk to a neighbour for the third time during that shop, expect tears, kicking and screaming. Half of your shopping will also likely end up on the floor if it gets in the way of said tantrum.
8. Try to climb out of the basket
Here we go again, they’re never happy! If you’re shopping with a tiny tot, expect that dash for freedom. Blink, and they’re standing up on the handles, using you as a handrail!
9. Say something completely inappropriate to the checkout worker
Why is it always in the most inappropriate moments and settings that our kids decide to bring up our most embarrassing anecdotes? All the checkout worker needs to do is flash a smile, and they’re suddenly hearing all about how mummy ripped her skirt when she sat into the car. Nice one!
10. Break/ spill/ crush something
Keep your eggs, juice bottles and sliced pans as far away as possible from those mischievous little hands. Whether it’s a mistake (due to a complete lack of spatial awareness) or they’re just feeling particularly naughty that day, something won’t survive the shop.
