I terrified my little girl and I'm truly sorry

When I was growing up I remember having blazing rows with my mother.

They appeared to stem from absolutely nothing, but escalated quickly until it reached a crescendo which saw my face red with anger and my mother’s white with fury before we both collapsed in a heap of exhausted tears.

I was under no illusions that I would likely suffer the same fate with my little girl once she hit her teens and I even patted myself on the back for my foresight, but it seems I was a little off the mark on that one.

My daughter didn’t need to hit her teens to reduce me to tears.

Grace is a determined little seven-year-old who speaks her mind and doesn’t hold back.

While I encourage this trait on a number of levels, it appears my daughter needs a little guidance as to when this attitude should be reined in, and while I normally attempt to knock it on the head when inappropriate, recently I fell short.

Returning home from work after an indescribably long day, my daughter decided to knock all my efforts.

From the dinner I made to the pyjamas I laid out for her, nothing was good enough, but it went far beyond childish surliness.

Childish surliness I can deal with, scathing remarks towards her brother and insensitive comments towards myself and my appearance, I cannot.

After laughing at my tenth attempt to get her to behave, I saw red.

And I screamed at her.

I don’t mean I just raised my voice, barked or even shouted, I screamed myself hoarse and watched in horror as she recoiled before bursting into tears.

Shaking with emotion, I slowly backed out of the room and held onto the wall for support before bursting into tears.

Quickly composing myself, I returned to the hallway where she stood wailing and crouched down for a hug.

Unsurprisingly, she pushed me away and stumbled towards her room.

I followed her and after a few minutes persuasion, I apologised, explained myself and insisted she take a moment to focus on her role in the situation.

It took longer than usual to patch things up because I understand I truly frightened her.

And the guilt is eating me alive.