Why do my children think Mum 'nags' but Dad 'tells'?

I'm a realist. As an exhausted mother-of-four, I don't really have any say in the matter.

Romantic notions of the perfect family life officially disappeared when I found myself pregnant in my earlies forties with my fourth child.

Already the mother of a sullen teenage boy, a hyper pre-teen daughter and a seven-year-old son who I once found eating dog biscuits under the stairs, I knew my chances of normal family life had definitely escaped me.

And yet despite dealing with almost everything life with four children has thrown at me, I still find myself dismayed by the role my children have foisted upon me.

I'm a nag, you see. And what makes me a nag exactly? Oh,you know, the usual. 

Requesting my daughter conceal emerging cleavage when she dresses herself, asking my teenage son not to use his younger brother as target practice and suggesting my now ten-year-old boy vary his palate somewhat.

I get it. Kids don't like being reminded that they're under our thumb, but why am I the nag when I make requests and Dad is not?

Why do I never hear "Dad is nagging me..." or "Daaaaaad, youre such a naaaag!" and yet I'm called it so often our neighbour's toddler christened me Naggy after spending a weekend in our home,

When Dad makes the same requests, pulls the kids' up on their behaviour or demands a rule is obeyed, he has merely 'told' them something."

"Dad, told me to clean my room" or "Dad told me I wasn't allowed." You see the distinction?

At worst, he's 'scary', but he's not a nag. And the thing about 'scary'? It get sh*t done.

Nags aren't scary, they're boring and annoying and they don't deserved to be listened to. Scary? Now, that's a different story.

After sixteen years of being called a nag, I'd be more than happy to be considered scary by my four kids.

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