Jesica Ryzynski is a mum-of-four who has taken on many of life's motherhood challenges.
Three of her children are well behaved; they tow in line with whatever mum says, going through the daily motions, and are fully aware of societal norms.
However, her fourth child isn't exactly cut from the same cloth, she isn't badly misbehaving, rather, just doing her own thing.
But sometimes it can be more than Mum can handle, often having to take some deep breaths to help her take a step back from the situation.
Writing for Her View From Home, Jesica states: "Fellow nursery school mums, people in grocery stores, [...] and relatives who would love to say something but wisely refrain from doing so, I see you there. I see your raised eyebrows, and poorly hidden expressions of shock at my child’s behaviour."
"And I certainly feel your judgement. I can hear the questions rolling around in your brain that you are dying to ask, but manage not to. I can also see you biting your tongue in a desperate attempt to stop yourself from telling me exactly where I am going wrong as a parent. I see you."
Jesica always thinks about her three other children in this situation, knowing that these people would be shocked if they realised her other children fall into line exactly how society would feel they should, however, she was blessed with her fourth.
"A little firecracker of a child who not only marches to the beat of her own drum, but who would happily smash that drum into a million pieces to avoid falling in line with the rest of the group."
"And trust me, I am regularly just as shocked and surprised by her behaviour as you are. Remember, I have three more at home, and I am baffled on a daily basis as to how my fourth could be so different," added Mum.
Jesica resorts to explaining how she took the same vitamins while pregnant with her first three, her daughter is raised the same as the rest of her children; nothing was done differently, she is just different.
Mum writes: "If she surprises you, you can imagine how often she surprises me. And I fought her personality. Oh, how I fought it. I was determined that somewhere in that little body there must be a complacent and easy going child, just like her older siblings. Surely it was just a phase."
While Jesica had hoped her daughter's ability to drive her crazy was just a phase, she was finally hit with the realisation that this was most likely never going to change - it was time to embrace it.
"Instead of getting angry and defensive at her refusal to blindly follow my rules, I looked in her eyes. I really looked. She wasn’t intentionally misbehaving. It wasn’t her mission in life to do the exact opposite of what I asked."
"She was my wild child. She was simply being fiercely and unapologetically herself. Her own person. And no amount of yelling and arguing and bribing on my part was going to change that. And do you know what? That’s pretty amazing."
The mum-of-four considers the society with which we now reside, being reminded about how it will consistently tell us how to act, what to wear, what we should weigh and how we should look, and is relieved to see her 'wild child' standing before her.
"It is my desperate hope that she will continue to be fierce in who is she and what she wants. I hope with all of my heart she will balk at conventions and refuse to blindly follow societal norms. I want her to stay wild."
"And I know she will go on to accomplish amazing things. She will accomplish them while being confidently and unapologetically herself."
Nonetheless, the mum-of-four is well aware of what lies ahead, an uphill battle with her wild child, but with each day that passes she will remember she does not need to tame her while teaching her.
"I will continue to take deep breaths and steps back."
Moreover, Mum has a simple request for the nursery mums, bank tellers and grocery store people: "While I continue down this road, unless you are offering me a strong cup of coffee, a hug or perhaps a glass of wine, please keep your raised eyebrows and shocked expressions to a minimum."
Because this Mum is raising a wild child, and she is not apologising for it. We're with you Jesica - what a wonderful outlook.
