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My partner is unsure about adoption: how do I convince him?

Parenthood is a difficult enough choice for most couples, and adoption is an even bigger decision. It’s only natural that one of the partners in a relationship will be unsure about the process – at least in the beginning, and sometimes for longer than that.

Find out what is worrying your partner about the adoption idea. Is it the cost? Your ability to be parents? Or whether you will love a child that’s not ‘yours’ as much? Make sure that you listen to the responses your partner gives you when you ask those kinds of questions – they’re as valid as your desire to adopt!

Tell your partner that you are interested in adoption, and that you are going to be researching the process and the concept. Ask whether you can share your information with them, but don’t force the issue. Your relationship will be very important if you do decide to adopt, so make sure you still spend time together as a couple, and don’t let the issue of adoption come between you.

If you can, arrange to attend support group meetings for adoptive families. The experience of spending time with adoptive families can help to make the concept more real for your partner.
However, remember that adoption is not a viable option unless you’re both on board, and this can take time. Whatever you do, give your partner time to think about the idea, and don’t try to force or coerce them into adopting.
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More questions

International adoption is growing in popularity - however, not all countries comply with UK adoption laws.
The Philippines is not a country specified on the UK adoption designated list. British citizens adopting in the Philippines need to apply for an adoption order in a UK court if they return to the UK in order for that adoption to be recognised in the UK. 
Some couples are not ready to give up trying to have a natural birth child and will want to continue IVF treatment during the adoption process.
While the criteria for fostering are not as strenuous as those for adoption, there are still certain requirements you need to fulfil in order to be considered.
Foster care provides for the temporary or permanent care of children who for one reason or another, cannot live with their own family.
Adoption is a major decision, and one that no one should take lightly, or try to force anyone into.
It’s impossible to say which is better – domestic or international adoption or fostering a child. Which is better for you depends on your unique situation.
Whether you are attempting to adopt a child who is related to you, or your step child, or a child who is orphaned or abandoned, there is a very specific legal procedure that has to be followed.

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